The past couple weeks have left me feeling BLEH. I found several things to blame those feelings on and I wrote it off, not wanting to really dive into the feelings. But then, last night, I had a revelation of where the feelings have been stemming from. Even though I didn’t want to think about it, to dig deep and examine them, God said “It’s time to dig.” ????

And while I was digging I thought about how I do these two things. I feel like a lot of women do them as well, but they’re called comparison & being a perfectionist. I had the revelation that I have this ideal “perfect” life in my mind, and then if something in my life isn’t going exactly how I want it to go, I start comparing; comparing to others and to what I think the ideal is. I allow these “if-then” statements plague my mind. And I’ve noticed the pattern in every aspect of my life recently.

In my business: “If I could just hit my next goal then I would be able to be more present in my marriage.” Or about my body: “If my thighs were a little more slim then I wouldn’t have a problem falling in love with swimsuits.” And even with my marriage: “If my past relationships would have been different, then I wouldn’t struggle with not feeling known, safe & loved by my husband always.”

And it all comes down to the biggest if-then statement; the one that fuels them all.

If my life was meeting these standards I’ve set for myself, THEN I’d be worthy.

But the truth is my worth isn’t based on the works I’m doing. If I have my life together or not. Or if my life is “perfect”. My worth is based on what Jesus says, and He calls me worthy.